We all get those funny emails, right? I rarely pass them on because I hate to clutter other people's inboxes. But MDH, Steve, sent me this list this week and I thought it was good enough to share.
Truths for Mature Humans
- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
- Nothing is worse than the moment in an argument when you realize you're wrong.
- I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
- There is great need for a sarcasm font.
- How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
- Was learning cursive really necessary?
- Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
- I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
- Bad decisions make good stories.
- You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
- Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
- I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to the ten-page technical report I swear I did not make any changes to.
- I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
- I think the freezer deserves a light, as well.
- I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
- I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Construction" routing option.
- I have a hard time discerning the fine line between boredom and hunger.
- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
- Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
- Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
- Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in less than 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
- The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
#24 reminded me of my photo for next year's Alzheimer's Art Quilt Initiative Challenge. There are more of us challenging each other and the theme is hockey! I look intimidating, right?